Routine

We eat Taco Bell in the truck, because it's quick, easy, fun, semi-healthy, and because I can't go home due to an indulgence I care not to reveal publicly. Emma is serving Jack bits of quesidilla in between bites of chips and beans. She has stepped in beans and is quick to give me her dirty sock. Jack keeps returning his chip for double dips into the warm nacho cheese. His quesidilla lays in his lap, crumpled like an old piece of paper.

We are parked in front of Emmie's school and I plead with Emma to show me Isaac. He has her heart. Well, at least on school days. This weekend she announced that she has two boyfriends- Zach & Isaac. (She has also announced this information to Zach, over their dinner shortly after they have hugged and declared their boyfriend/girlfriend status. He doesn't seem to mind. In fact, he has three girlfriends.) Neither Zach nor Emma can tell us what it means to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Good.

Isaac hasn't arrived yet, but it's time for Emma to go sign in. She kisses her brothers goodbye. Jack laughs. He has smeared pintos & cheese all over his perfect face. He smiles through the beans. I open the front door to let Emma out of the truck. Goldfish spill into the gutter from the floorboard.

I check Emma in. Her teacher has notified us that this week are kindergarten assessments. Emma is oblivious to the pending testing doom: Isaac has arrived. She is not ashamed of her affections. She is quick and loud to point him out; he is standing a foot in front of her. She walks to her class with the boy who has taken my daughter's heart for the hour.

The boys and I drive home. Will has talked himself to sleep and has missed an opportunity to question the boy about intentions with his sister. Jack is still smothered in beans. Cheep, Momm-ee. Dip. Dip. I pass Jack a chip at his request. His head is cocked 45 degrees to the side and he smiles the cheesiest beaniest grin, perfect teeth shining through the mess, eyes closed. I laugh loud. He has caught me off guard and immediately stolen my heart. He laughs and grins again, at least 15 more times, each time with eyes glued shut and crows feet forming.

We are home. The house is quiet. Jack is changed, the castaway chips banished from his jeans. Both he & Will rest quietly. I alone with my thoughts, cherishing even the typical day's fleeting moments.

Tornado See, Tornado Do?

I find that most of my blogs, besides Emma's priceless Eminisms have been about Jack. He is at the age where everything he does is so crazy and every move he makes is so aimless and active, that I find a story in everything he does. Above all, I journal this for him. I can look back and remember each crazy story & try to cling onto them for as long as possible.

Amy & I have been involved with a wonderful, highly recommended Bible Study. One day last week, Will wasn't feeling well. Even though it was our Bible Study day, I needed to take Will to the doctor and Amy graciously offered to come over and watch my two other blessings.

Upon returning home from the doctor, we decided to browse through our weekly material together, since we didn't get a chance to meet with our group. Every question seemed like it was interrupted by one of the blessings. But finally! The blessings were quiet & content. Emma was coloring her Bible Study page and Jack & Noah had retreated to the play room and shut the door. So we thought...

It was much too quiet for much too long. (How many other ways can this be phrased?- The calm before the storm. The quiet moment between the thunder & lightening. The silence before the bomb hits...)

We decided that a check should be made on the youngest of the blessings. I got up to find the play room door closed, indeed, but the front door wide open! The boys had gone rogue!

Instead of remaining calm and collected when crisis hits, I did exactly what any mom strives not to do. I screamed! AMY! THEY ARE GOOONNNNE! I sprinted outside to find the two escaped convicts several houses down the street, trying to now break into a car for their getaway. As soon as one recognized that I was within close proximity, he ran with the other monkey close in tow.

(Now I am very proud to say that I ran down the street! And I caught up with the two! And I didn't pee my pants!)

The two boys are best of friends, which I think is absolutely wonderful. Jack loves his "No-No" and will do whatever Noah does, fight over whatever Noah wants, follow Noah wherever he goes and vice versa. It is such a joy and pleasure to watch Jack with his best friend, even though they tend to create more of a destructive epicenter together than alone.

God has blessed Roy and me having a priceless friendship with Noah's parents, and now Jack & Emma with another sweet tornado- Noah.

A child's mind never rests, unlike mine.

Tonight during Emma's normal bedtime ritual of reading books and singing songs she asked me a couple of deep questions that required me to think quickly which in my current state of exhausted post Easter gluttony was rather difficult. "Dad, how do we celebrate Easter?" I believe this question was brought on by the fact that Heather and I have tried to instill in her that Easter is in fact about the resurrection of Jesus Christ, not the idea of a freakishly large rabbit dropping off baskets full teeth rotting goodies not supported by the American Dental Association . I proceeded to explain we go to church and there is a sermon about the death and resurrection of Christ and then we celebrate by coming together with family and friends thanking God for his gift to us and of course eating a ridiculous amount of food over the better half of the afternoon. Mind you at this point I have been laying on my daughters bed for over 10 minutes and for those who know me I can fall asleep in under a minute at any given time when I'm tired, therefore my eyes were glossed over and the dark was closing in around me when; "Dad why do you love me?" After realizing what she asked I responded very intelligently with "What?" "What do you mean why do I love you?" I figured I could use the active listening technique of re-asking her the question she just asked me in order to wake up and not miss this great opportunity with a stupid answer. I was able to explain she is a gift from God to Heather and I. I told her since God blessed us with her we must cherish her as a gift and raise her to know who Jesus is. I also told her she is an amazing little girl and an absolute joy to be with and to love her just comes naturally. I gave her another kiss and told her I love her. Thank you God for the blessing of my wonderful children.

Eminisms (Quotes for the day)

I am girl that likes to eat.
-Emma, face covered in BBQ sauce, eating ribs.

If you take your eye out and put it on top of your other eye, over your eyebrow, it will make a number eight.
-Emma, thinking about numbers

Jesus died on the cross for Valentine's Day.
-Emma, pondering the different holiday meanings

Quote for the day

There's something wrong with you
-Roy, in response to Heather unknowingly asking the same question multiple times.

Evening

In the dark, I rock sick Will, as he wheezes and coughs on my shoulder. I am able to sing to him about my God's Amazing Grace. My heart swells.

Emma's footsteps thud toward my rocker from down the hall. I can't see you. She finds me and places her head on my shoulder and hums along. My heart swells.

Jack calls for Mom-mee grow louder. He is carried by Roy and says Ni-Ni Mom-mee through the sides of his pacifier. He leans over and places a wet kiss on my mouth. He head butts Will before clinging again to Roy. My heart swells.

I am left alone, to sing to Will, as Emma has left to sing a made up lullaby to Cooper. She leaves Cooper slowly, climbs up into our bed, and turns her song to our Lord, as she praises Him singing Hallelujah. My heart spills over.

It's quiet now. Will calm in his bassinet. Jack quiet in his room. Emma and Roy reading books in her bed. I check in on Emma and watch her laugh with her tongue between her teeth as Roy "throws the lion" out of her room. I ponder these small passing moments that make wearing dirty nursing bras and third day hair so worth it...

Never Say 'Never'

There are things that I said I would never do in parenting. For example, when I found out Emma was going to be an Emma, I agreed never to dress her in pink, in bows, in fruu-fruu. I voiced quite willingly how bad sugar is for my kids. Emma would never taste it until she was at least two! I would never use the television as a babysitter while I attended to the chores or dozed on the couch. But as soon as the little girl came into this world, she was our pink sassy sweet-toothed princess who loved her Baby Einstein movies!

I have discovered as Emma has aged, she has developed a flair for the dramatic. When she falls she can scream to make your blood curdle. She can't function properly in the morning until she has had at lease one cup of her chocolate milk. She must feel and look like a princess and any less is unfathomable! And she can pout like a superstar!

At rest time today, Emma moaned about her pinky toe. Apparently it was stubbed on our outing today and must have been in shock until quiet time. Examining the small stub, I discovered nothing more than a sweet undamaged morsel. But still Emma moaned. So I once again resorted to resolve the situation outside my usual parenting tactics. I gave her medicine. Actually, a placebo. I dosed her early with her fluoride and told her it was going to make her feel better.

Emma's damaged toe has now been fully restored. And I must go now to take a short nap, while Emma is entertained with a quiet movie...

Growing Pains

This weekend, Roy converted Jack's crib into a toddler bed. Roy, Emma & Jack had a great time putting it all together using all the tools. Bedtime that night was a success!

But yesterday's nap time, as well as today's were really tough. Ok, excruciatingly tough! When it was time to leave Jack in his bed, he just melted down.

Even though we've been through this before, but I have no recollection of how we handled Emma's transition. Jack keeps saying, Aaa-done, Mommeee. Aaa-done!, while he bangs on his bedroom door and attempts to pull out his buzzed hair.

So, twice now I have laid in his miniature bed, feeling quite like Goldilocks in a bed that's not just right at all. While I lay next to him, he puts his pacifier in his sweet mouth, puts his hand to his hair to calm himself, and calms knowing I am right next to him.

It was quite a moment, considering I have never really taken the time in his small life to sleep next to my prince. So once again I am reminded to throw the books and good reason out the dirty window, cuddle up to this blessing, and savor the moment where my son & I can actually lay next to one another comfortably in this small toddler bed.

Quote for the day

This is why I don't try to think in front of you. It always falls apart on me.
-Roy, frustrated while I tried to guess what drug poppy seed is related to.

Bending Light

Emma was mesmerized while she watched the light bend through one of our mosaic candles in our front room. It was a perfect teaching moment, as she patiently waited while I explained what was happening. She sat on our couch and looked in awe at the miniature rainbows that decorated our ceiling, walls, furniture, part of Jack & even pieces of her face...

Quote for the day

I love the way he smells.
-Roy, snuggling in bed with Will, early in the morning

Hey! I've seen a boat!

I didn't intend to, but I drove all the way from my house to Target today with Emma's backpack on my truck bed cover. Do you know how far that is? 3.9 miles. I mapped it out, because I was quite impressed with this accomplishment. I don't recall becoming absent minded, it just seems to have happened slowly over time.

I didn't even realize the backpack was taking a ride with us until another mom caught us at the light and graciously told us about our illegal immigrant. (And I put it there!) I just looked at her, and honestly told her: I'm crazy. She actually nodded her head with compassion as we shared the moment and the instant connection.

I can't even focus as I write this down for selfish purposes. (Because someday, that I can foretell being very soon, I may no longer even begin to make sense- wait has that already happened? READER: Do not respond.)

So, back to not focusing... During the day, I am almost as aimless as Jack, I am just more refined. I move from room to room reeking havoc on the messes, trying to bring order to the destruction but with every step, how easily I become distracted. Even now typing this, I gaze off at Roy, so peacefully sleeping, and I think: Will he wake if I pinch that small blackhead on his back?

How did I get here? Will I ever think, act, do the intelligence thing again? And moreover, how can I go through an entire day and not feel like I have accomplished one single task? I know, taking care of my children is an accomplishment, but there are days I just crave to feel like I have contributed more.

So these are my crazy thoughts. I guess the first step is admitting I am crazy, forgetful, overwhelmed & unaccomplished.

I don't think I have ever eaten a fish... Gee, it feels really good to get THAT off my chest...

Funny for the moment

-What profession would you absolutely not like to participate in?
-Ummm.... I wouldn't want to burn monkeys.
-Nor they you.

Will Ferrell as James Lipton interviewing Kate Hudson as Drew Barrymore

Quote for the day

"You can suck it out of your bod-dummm Dadddd!"
-Emma, trying to be funny, moments before she got in trouble for being disrespectful.

Quote for the day

"Oh...I see your crack...Look at your cute little crack...Koochee-koochee-Coo..."
-Emma, in response to an early morning sighting

Tornados

Jack has been referred to before as my tornado. [Now I am a California girl and my only experience with tornadoes is cringing while I watch Bill Paxton in the movie TWISTER (this blog does not endorse TWISTER or any of it's actors).] (My idea of) A tornado is pure destruction. No rhyme or reason to the tornado's path, but to destroy every thing that it comes across. So, that's Jack. He is so aimless in his wanderings around the house at times.

This afternoon, when we got home from another pathetic trip to Winco (this blog does endorse Winco- great prices, healthy stress, good stories for the grandparents), Emma was sleeping sick on the couch. Will was slumbering peacefully in his car seat. Jack was on the loose:

Move the rug, fold the rug, slide the rug. Torment sick Sissy on the couch. Rip Emma's blanket off, and grab some hair in the process. Run from Mommy. Wake Will from blissful slumber... And so on was the evening.

I absolutely love watching the "boy" come out in him, even though, I have to admit that sometimes I cringe at the messes made all over the house.

The most precious moments I have with him are at the end of the day. Jack actually stops twisting & running. He sits on my lap, and listens to his books. He places his head on my shoulder and snuggles up to me as I sing to him. My tornado has calmed for the night. At least until the sun arises...

Quote for the day

"Uhhh... We're playing in here... Could you please close the door?"
-Emma, in response to discovering her in the downstairs shower, behind the closed glass door, playing with our cat Tulley.

Quote for the day

"Can you go get the ladder and the watter fly, Dad?"
- Emma, in response to a mosquito on the loose, that had finally landed on the ceiling.

Water + Dirt = Jack

Jack changes his outfit at least twice a day. Not because Jack is concerned with what he wears. Everything he wears becomes unwearable. (OK, the exception to this rule is his pajamas. This is because he is confined to his crib while he wears them.)

One of Jack's purposes in this life is to find every use for dirt- to make mud, to be dirty, to consume dirt. I first caught onto his calling, his desire for gross consumptions, right after Roy had brought home Cooper. Jack & I were in the backyard and he was running crazy in his diaper. He saw a little puddle on the ground and rubbed his pacifier in it. Needless to say, this hasn't occurred since- after he put his pacifier back into his mouth, he wasn't too impressed with the taste of Cooper's urine... But countless times since then, he has found me to show me the mouthful of dirt and rocks he has sampled from the backyard.

So I end this post with pictures of my tornado, water painting a picture for Grandma, which at some point he became the canvas.